Porn addiction Archives - Page 3 of 4 - Help for Those Dealing with Pornography Addiction

My Free Book - How to Break Porn Addiction

By R PikeLeave a Comment

Jul 26 4

Hi All!! I am very excited about this post.. because it is the announcement of my book that has been 2 years in the making:

How to Break the Bonds of Pornography Addiction and Live in True Freedom

Two plus years later, I am leaving perfection behind and getting this out there to help anyone who is struggling with Pornography addiction.

Inside my book you will find a practical guide on how to break free from pornography addiction. In all my years of reading on this subject, I have found very good books and some not so good. Most books leaned too heavily into the spiritual side of addiction while others had no spiritual side.

My aim in this book was to bring a balance of spiritual healing and aid along with practical tactics you can use in your daily life. This guide will walk you through some personal processing and steps to get yourself ready for healing and breaking free from pornography. There is also a large amount of resources that will point you in the right direction to get yourself some further help.

I am not a therapist, counselor or pastor, just a recovering addict trying to help others who want out of the pornography trap. Please download my book for free. Please read it, follow the directions and visit the resources. You will soon be putting together your battle plan against pornography and walking in freedom.

Freedom is good. We were never meant to be slaves to anything, especially sin. Live Free today.

Download it Free right here : How-to-Break-the-Bonds-of-Pornography-addiction-and-Live-in-True-Freedom

The Adulteress and Pornography

By R PikeLeave a Comment

Feb 24 0

We can learn a lot from chapter 5 of the book of Proverbs. This chapter speaks about the adulteress woman and how she can easily snare a man if he does not listen to wisdom and avoid her.

What does this have to do with pornography addiction? The adulteress woman in this chapter can be replaced with pornography itself. Follow me and see if this parallel is definitely valid.

1. My son, give attention to my wisdom, incline your ear to my understanding; 2. That you may observe discretion and your lips may reserve knowledge.

First off, Solomon advises his son to listen to him and gain wisdom. Pay attention to what I am about to tell you this is important! Solomon is trying to warn his son from the point of view of experience perhaps.

3. For the lips of an adulteress drip honey and smoother than oil is her speech

The adulteress speaks words that are sweet and smooth. She has a sensual proposition. Pornography speaks to us the same way doesn’t it? Pornography says: “Come and take a peek, I am ready for you and have all the pleasure you are looking for, You will get a break from your boring world just for a while.” That scantily dressed attractive woman from the photo calls out to you to take break and enter her world.

4. But in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword.

When all the sensual fun is over, you are left with the bitter reality of what you just did. You are full of shame and regret. “I can’t believe I was so stupid to fall again” It hurts like a two edged sword – It does severe damage. It damages your integrity, your marriage, and other ways in which you will find out about later. You can’t play with it without getting hurt.

5. Her feet go down to death, her steps take hold of Sheol. 6. She does not ponder the path of life; her ways are unstable, she does not know.

Pornography and the adulteress are lost and on the way to Hell. They both live for today and do not consider the consequences of their actions. Those lost in the sin of pornography live for that high that pornography gives them. Some of them are unaware of where it will lead them both in consequences in this life and in eternal life.

7. Now then, my sons, listen to me and do not depart from the words of my mouth. 8. Keep your way far from her and do not go near the door of her house,

Solomon warns them to do what he says and do not even go near the adulteress! Stay far from her! Pornography should be kept away from – far away. How many times did you ‘play around the edges’ as I did and ‘only’ look at lingerie or half nudes?? Then what happened? You, just like me were drawn into all out pornography. Solomon was wise to say stay far away. You can’t play around the edges! She is a master seducer and you are weak.
9. Or you will give your vigor to others and your years to the cruel one; 10. And strangers will be filled with your strength and your hard-earned goods will go to the house of an alien; 11. And you groan at your final end, when your flesh and your body are consumed; 12. And you say, “How I have hated instruction! and my heart spurned reproof! 13. “I have not listened to the voice of my teachers, nor inclined my ear to my instructors! 14. “I was almost in utter ruin in the midst of the assembly and congregation

The price we pay for giving into an adulteress and pornography is with our time, material goods and our souls! Pornography steals our time. How many times did you sit down to look at some only to come to your senses 4 hours later? It steals our time in this way and also with the way it preoccupies our waking thoughts too. Pornography will steal your material goods because it makes you less productive and are dumping money into buying pornography. Pornography will steal your soul. What a statement. Very sobering. Pornography can turn you into a monster if you let it. Ted Bundy feasted on a steady diet of porn and he admitted to its influence on his life.

Drink water from your own cistern and fresh water from your own well. 16. Should your springs be dispersed abroad, streams of water in the streets? 17. Let them be yours alone and not for strangers with you. 18. Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth. 19. As a loving hind and a graceful doe, let her breasts satisfy you at all times; be exhilarated always with her love. 20. For why should you, my son, be exhilarated with an adulteress and embrace the bosom of a foreigner?

Solomon advises us to draw water from our own well. Don’t get your sexual satisfaction from a stranger. Don’t give yourself to anyone but your wife. Your wife and you should exclusively be the only sexual satisfaction for each other. Pornography seems like it satisfies, but it really is empty. You may go to porn for intimacy, but it is a false intimacy. You are still hungry after using pornography, it just doesn’t satisfy.

21. For the ways of a man are before the eyes of the LORD, and He watches all his paths. 22. His own iniquities will capture the wicked, and he will be held with the cords of his sin. 23. He will die for lack of instruction, and in the greatness of his folly he will go astray

Finally, Solomon reminds us of the reality of the Lord watching our every move and the consequences of our sin. Would you watch pornography with someone else in the room that would not approve? Well, the Lord sees us at all times! He watches all our paths! Every time you watch pornography, the Lord knows what you are doing. Our sin will bind us and we will pay for them. No one watches porn anonymously and without consequence!

Proverbs chapter five was given as a challenge for our accountability group to read everyday for a week. It is a great example to remind us of why we need to live pure lives. Pornography is the enemy and it seeks us out. It tries to trip us up and bring us down with itself. We need to stay far away from pornography and not even play near the edges. We in no way are allowed to see any nudity other than that of our wives. Pornography robs us of our time and resources. It will put us to shame and will steal away our souls. Focus your sexual desires on your wife and enjoy her as she was meant to be for you. Pornography will not satisfy you, it only takes from you. Remember that the eyes of the Lord are everywhere and are watching you. The Lord will reveal the secrets and all things done in private. If you do not repent and stop using pornography, you will suffer the consequences. No one sins without consequences.

Confessions of a Sex Addict Video

By R PikeLeave a Comment

Dec 12 0

confessions of a sex addict

Confessions of a sex addict - hear the deep pain through this talk

Hear a sex & pornography addict speak very candidly about his addiction. Many of the origins of his addiction will ring true with many of us. He speaks about the thrill of the hunt how his addiction flourished and many other aspects of sexual addiction. He is now clean by the grace of God.

Watch the video here and talk about it below: Confession of a Sex Addict

Side Effects of Porn

By R PikeLeave a Comment

Jul 6 14

Pornography has serious side effects to the wary user

Before you indulge, Check the side effects of porn

Last time we looked at some of the reasons why a porn habit is tough to break.We use porn in secret and think that if no one knows, it can’t hurt anyone.A sin that is kept in the dark will grow just like a fungus.The sex saturated society we live it won’t let us forget about how we need to put sex as our number one need.Everywhere we turn there are reminders of how important sex is and how we value it above many other things.When we feast on sex saturated media, we buy into the value system society offers us in regards to porn and sex.We also have been led to believe that use of pornography has no ill effects on the user and that our usage has no effects on anyone around us.As long as we can justify our usage and point out the lack of side effects, no harm, no foul, or so we think.Porn is a tough habit to break and these are just a few of the reasons why we stay enslaved to it.

This time we are going to take a look at what porn does to its users.Contrary to popular culture’s stance on pornography, there are side effects to using porn.Drug companies are legally required to warn you of the possible side effects while taking their product.Many people will never experience all of the side effects listed or they will have one or two of them but won’t attribute them to the drug they are taking.It’s the same thing with porn usage.You will have a side effect, but you may not realize or notice it yourself.Sometimes people around you will notice something that you are blind to.Here are a few of the side effects that may be present in you, some obvious, others not so much.

It amplifies our selfishness.Pornography focuses on our satisfaction, our needs, and turns us towards ourselves.When you watch porn- who gets the most satisfaction in the film?-The guy.Most pornography elevates the importance of the guy’s pleasure and shows the woman as the willing provider of it.This theme runs throughout the pornography world and will find its way into your life.After hundreds of impressions of these situations, you will find yourself acting more selfishly, especially in your interactions with women.Why?Because the standard pornography theme has subconsciously tricked you into believing that your feelings and satisfaction are greater than anyone else’s.You have satisfied yourself with the images of others who willingly gave in to your desires and needs.Now you are more biased towards your own satisfaction that you will act selfishly towards those around you.It will be hard for you to see this yourself, but you will become more selfish than you already are.Don’t be surprised when someone close to you points this out.

Pornography changes our perception of women.Women become objects instead of human beings.This goes along with the point above.The most common theme in pornography is a woman giving herself to the man to please him.The woman is portrayed as super eager to please her man, that she will do whatever he wants, even to the point of degrading herself.The focus is on the man getting off.Think about what usually happens in the end of a pornography film.The man gets off and then its over!When he is done, it’s all over.It’s all about the guy.The woman’s need is not considered and then she is degraded by how the guy shows her his thanks… by covering her in his semen.. that is real class, huh.This scene, played over and over before our eyes will make us believe that women are available anytime men are ready and they will do whatever we want because they are here to please us.We will look at them not as humans with personalities and feelings, but as sluts here to please us.You will know that your thinking about women has changed to viewing them as objects when you scan their body and immediately think of them in bed servicing you.You won’t even register their facial features, their smile and the color of their hair or eyes.Immediately your eyes will go to their body and you will start lusting for them.Women are created in the image of God deserving of our honor and respect. They are not here just for our pleasure.

Pornography robs you of your passion for anything else besides itself.Pornography takes control of our passion and uses it to satisfy itself.Your passions will get consumed by it and you have none left to pursue noble causes.Pornography is a mean task-master, it grabs you and will force you to feed it unmercifully!You will find yourself searching for more time to give to it, plotting out ways to get away to feed it.Your spare moments are spent thinking of the next time you can get lost in pornography.Pornography drains you because so much energy and passion go into feeding it, that you have no energy or passion to put forth into other areas of your life.That is why one of the ways out of pornography is to find a new passion.It is very true that idle hands are the devil’s workshop.Just let yourself be idle and not involved in something and watch pornography knock on the door asking you come in.

Pornography will destroy your ability to be intimate (emotionally) with your spouse and others.It develops a false intimacy, one where you relate with someone who is attractive, satisfies your physical needs and does not require anything from you.This relationship you have with pornography is very different from real life.In real life, you have to speak with people who don’t always affirm you and actually speak to you, sometimes even in anger.Relationships in porn films are superficial and only for one thing: sex.There very little communication.In real life you cannot just walk up to someone and expect sex after a few words.You may find yourself wanting to disengage from conversations with your spouse and retreating to the world of porn where you create your own adventure.Real emotional intimacy with your spouse is much more work and painful at times verses what happens in the porn world.

Pornography will destroy your ability to be intimate physically with your spouse.Pornography provides physically attractive women who have all the right proportions you love.The vast variety of women available allows you to be picky about who you choose to get off on.You can have a different woman each time.All the while you are setting yourself up for failure in the bedroom with your spouse.Your spouse will seem boring and not as attractive.You lose the appetite for sex with your wife and your encounters become infrequent.When you do come together you may have a difficult time getting the job done and your mind may also be elsewhere (with a porno star).Your wife knows something is up!Don’t think you can hide it.If you aren’t totally there for her she will be suspicious.

Pornography will grow the time you spend in fantasy land.Once exposed to this exciting world where anything goes and there are no problems, you will find yourself trying to escape to this place anytime you can.While you are waiting in traffic, mowing the lawn, in the bathroom, trying to fall asleep or anywhere else you can go and put your mind in neutral, you will find yourself fantasizing about sex.Pornography will get in your head and it will expand to take up as much space on your hard drive like a virus!You will become more distant to your spouse when you spend lots of time in fantasy land.Maybe she does have a point when she says you ‘are distant lately’.

Pornography will make you act differently in the bedroom.Your focus will become more on your own satisfaction and not so much giving your wife pleasure and you will want to try things you saw in pornography.You may not spend the time getting her ready and paying attention to her needs as you are to ‘getting it done’.Think about the pornography scenes you have watched… how many of them involve lengthy kissing and foreplay?Not many.They usually get down to business.This is what you will start to emulate.You will also want to try things that you saw in pornography.Many of the things you saw in pornography are not healthy and should not be done.Anal sex, for example is shown in lots of pornography, but it is unhealthy and will hurt the person done to.You obviously should never force anyone to do something that they are not comfortable with.Have you wanted to ‘talk dirty’ to your wife?Whether or not you have said it, I will bet it has come to your mind.

Take all these points together and don’t you think you wife will get wise to your pornography consumption?Of course she will!She may not be able to finger the problem, but she will be on alert.Maybe you say she will never know because you have had this problem before she knew you.Consider this:When you go through your cycles of pornography usage (going from high usage to no usage) do you think your actions change based on which cycle you’re in?I would say yes.Be honest and remember that whatever you feed will grow!

If you feed your pornography addiction it will grow and you will be displaying many of the side effects given above as you progress in the addiction.When you starve your pornography addiction and redirect your passions into other areas, the side effects of pornography will dissipate and not be as noticeable.

Even if you were using pornography before you met her, you have been through the normal cycles of usage.Chances are you thought that when you got married, you would not need pornography anymore and so you stopped when you first met and were married.The point is, she has seen you at your best (off of pornography) and at your worst (using pornography) and she will notice the difference.

Maybe you aren’t married and are thinking this doesn’t apply to you.You will display some of the side effects of using pornography.These side effects will directly impact how you treat the women you date.They may not want to date you for long, or maybe you get more rejections than you like.Whatever the case, you will be able to identify with some of the side effects and they will be picked up by some people.

Consider these side effects before you consider using porn again.Porn is bad for your health!

Using porn has some unforseen side effects

Using porn has some unforseen side effects

Why A Porn habit is so hard to break

By R PikeLeave a Comment

Jul 2 1

Last time we looked at why porn is so addictive. We learned that a chemical reaction in your brain just like what a drug user experiences is part of why it is so addictive. This along with the climax we experience from masturbation puts a double whammy on the body to give us a euphoric pleasure. We also talked about the cycle of porn usage and how we go from craving to acting on the craving and using porn to shame & guilt and swearing to not do it again. We find ourselves in this cycle over and over again.

Lost in the porn addiction cycle we long to get out, but it seems there is no use. We feel almost helpless. We tell ourselves that this is just something we have to live with; anyways it is not hurting anyone right? Deep down inside we secretly loathe ourselves because of it. We think of ourselves as dirty, weak creatures who would be looked down upon if anyone ever found out about what we do while alone.

The biggest reason that a porn habit is hard to break is because of its secrecy! Porn is a secret sin! The internet provides anonymity for us to seek out porn within the safety of our homes. Erase the internet history, dump the cookies and erase the temporary internet files and know one will know. We don’t have to get in our cars and risk being seen walking into an adult bookstore. Covering our tracks and hiding all traces has been how we have been living. If no one knows, I will be able to keep my marriage and respect that everyone has for me.

The secrecy is a double edged sword! You will be able to hide your secret porn life and keep your status as an outstanding husband, dad and citizen, but you will not like yourself. The secrecy also will perpetuate the porn usage. No one knows, and you can keep doing whatever you like. Porn addiction grows when it is in the dark, secret place. Porn is like a fungus – it thrives in the dark and dies when exposed to the light! Part of your battle plan will involve telling someone about your problem. You will be amazed at how much release you will feel when you expose your porn problem. We will talk at length about this later.

A porn habit is so hard to break because of the sex crazed culture we live in. Everywhere you turn; TV, billboards, magazines, the office – sexily & seductively dressed people are everywhere. This culture has a preoccupation with sex. Sex has been elevated to idol status and we learn to seek after it and revere it like it was a deity. Listen to the radio or watch TV and talk about sex is everywhere. Sexual conquests, affairs, and seduction are commonly spoke about and portrayed throughout the day as the be all end all of our existence. To a porn addict, these bombardments cause us to think more about sex and want to use porn. We can’t turn our sex filled minds off and onto more noble things while we are assaulted at every corner! Speaking as a visually stimulated man, it is very hard to keep your eyes & mind on the straight and narrow.

A porn habit is very hard to break because many of us believe that our porn usage is not hurting anyone. - There are no victims from my pornogrpahy use. We think, ‘I am not physically cheating on my spouse’, or ‘Porn actresses have made a decision to act, they are not coerced’, or ‘Porn does not change the way I act towards my family and co-workers’. So if it is not hurting anyone and sex is natural, why is it wrong? I truly believed this for many years and thought that porn usage was normal for many people. What I didn’t realize was that porn was changing the way I looked at women, was causing me to be more selfish, was robbing me of my passion for anything else, and was destroying my ability to be intimate emotionally and physically with anyone. Porn will rob you of passion and intimacy and cause you to put yourself and your needs above anyone else. There is much more to elaborate on these points later.

Using porn is so hard to break away from because of the secrecy involved, the sex crazed society we live in and the lies we believe as to porn not hurting anyone. If we are doing something in the privacy of our homes that no one knows about, but is talked about and reinforced everywhere we turn and is not hurting anyone why would it be wrong? For porn to be wrong, we would have to be opposed to it morally and show that it has detrimental effects to those who use it and society in general.

In our next installment we will talk more about the affects of porn on its users.

Why Pornography is so addictive - your brain on porn

By R PikeLeave a Comment

Jul 1 2

Your Brain on Porn - Why porn is so addictive

First in a series of understanding porn addiction and putting together your battle plan to get free.

Remember your first exposure to pornography? I do. I remember the rush that overcame my body. I knew it was ‘dirty’ and wrong, but I was very excited and felt my heart beat faster and a high like I had never known before. Right in front of me was a magazine that had a nude woman in it. It was the glimpse that every pre-teen boy daydreamed about.

That first impression for you probably made you feel the same way – a rush of adrenaline that sped your heart up. It doesn’t matter how old you were at that first peek. Even now, years latter you still feel that rush when you expose yourself to porn.

Little did you and I know that at the first exposure we were opening ourselves up to a world that would suck us in and toy with our minds and bodies. That exhilaration we felt and still feel when we take a look at porn is caused by a chemical reaction in the brain. That chemical reaction released endorphins and other potent chemicals that are the same as when a drug addict takes a hit. We have become addicted to that high feeling we get when we take a hit of porn! This chemical reaction not only gets us high, but also is strong enough to imprint the images we are viewing into our minds!

You now know why porn is highly addictive and why we cannot escape the images of sex in our heads! I bet you can recall some scenes from the first porn movie you watched or the pictures out of that magazine you saw years ago.

Pornography is highly addictive because of the addictive chemical properties. We love to feel good don’t we? Alcohol, drugs, porn, or any other addictive substance all alter our state of mind and give us feelings of pleasure and let us escape from our daily grind. Let’s face it, life is tough and many of us use different ways to unplug and get away. Porn makes us feel high and when you combine it with masturbation; you get a double feel good experience!

Those images that get imprinted into your mind also further the addiction. Sex on the brain is the running joke brought against men anyhow. When you imprint sex scenes into your memory banks, they will pop up when you want to recall them and even when you don’t. When you don’t want to recall them they will clamor to get in to your conscience thinking and try to control you. Ever see a pretty girl with a nice body and then BAM, your mind takes you back to the porn scene you watched previously? Now, when you get this scene flashed in front of you, the chemical reaction starts to rev you up and you need an outlet for this energy. You will then turn to porn and masturbation to relieve it. This cycle continues and before you know it, you are spending hours a day feeding your porn habit.

The cycle of porn continues in your life until you decide to do something about it. You know how the cycle goes. A trigger goes off in your head and causes you to get a craving, you try to deny the craving but it won’t go away. Now you figure the only way to get rid of this craving is to give in to it, so you go and use porn. Afterwards you feel so ashamed and guilty. You say to yourself; ‘Why did I go and do that again? I won’t do it again. From here on out, no more porn!’ It isn’t long till one of your triggers knocks at the door. You try to ignore it. It won’t go away. So you give in again.

Next time we will talk about why it is so hard to break free from a porn habit.

If you can identify with any of the above, then you will need stay tuned as we dig deeper into porn addiction and how you can get yourself free from it. Subscribe via RSS, add you your Yahoo page, and bookmark this site.